Be Well: How to Forge A Better Relationship With Money

<div class="block">Tonia Gaudiuso, author and money empowerment coach, joined Cheddar News to talk about her book <i>Permission to be Rich. </i>She also talked about how people can establish better relationships with money.</div>

beWell

It is no secret that money stresses people out a thriving wallet study. Found 90% of Americans have financial considerations, giving them really ridiculous stress levels. So today we have some help. We have author Tonya Guo with her book permission to be rich and she's gonna help really help us have a healthy relationship with money. So talk to me first about, you know, why you wrote this book? Yeah, absolutely. So I wrote permission to be rich. Steps become more powerful than money because I really wanted to help people transform their relationships with money. So I found after being a bookkeeper in with companies and with individuals that I started to see a pattern and I was doing this for over 20 years. And so what I found was there was this connection with people's money and then that's what's actually controlling their money. Ok. And so it was at this point that I decided to become a money empowerment coach to write my book and to really start addressing the issue or what I found is the gap that the emotional part of money isn't really being spoken about in the financial world or financial literacy being talked about also in everyday life, which is what contributes to the financial stress that people have. People have, like, bad habits and they, you know, are trying to seek, you know, maybe happiness through purchases that they maybe shouldn't be making. Like, yeah, absolutely. So, it, it, it is, I feel like this lack of education as well, but it's also what I teach is, like, know your numbers. Ok. And so it is this, I don't know. Right. I I talk to people and they're like, I don't know what I'm spending on my money or they'll go and do retail therapy and just go buy something, right? And then they kind of regret the purchase because now it's filled with guilt. So it's really teaching how to be responsible with your money so that you could enjoy it. I do teach a method of like having two accounts. So this is part of the techniques that I teach like have one for your bill pay which is expenses that you know like your rent, your you know, utilities, all the stuff and then have a debit card account, put money on the side for restaurants, for shopping so that when you're doing that you don't feel guilty like you're robbing from yourself or you're swiping you're like, oh my God, did I just take my rent money? My mortgage money. Ok. And so having it separated really helps. Alright, let's talk I know that you lay it out really clearly. There are five specific steps. So let's start with. The first one is focus and here is where we really want to get organized. Yes. So this stuff I really talk about clarity. So it is the point of this. I don't know. And answering this question of, I don't know because this is where we give our power away to money. So I don't know what's in my accounts. I don't know what my expenses are. I don't know my income, I don't know my savings and it's because we're so filled with avoidance because we're attaching to money. All of this self worth. That's actually really not true. OK? The numbers are just there to tell you if something is doing well or doing bad like that's it, it's just the gauge. It doesn't mean that you're still doing bad with money. Ok. So then this one is foundation and that, that's like, what's your big vision? Yes. So I really have here. People taught to visualize in their minds like what's their dream life look like? A lot of the time we associate it with things, but it's really about emotions and the way you wanna feel and really starting to see that as the reality and then having your numbers match what that is and having you're organized, having a budget, having a structure. So it's matching the emotions to the actual logical side of it and combining them both. OK. And then next comes freedom. So that is, you know what we've got to take the training wheels off here, you gotta take the training wheels off. Freedom is about action. So plan is great. But if you don't take action on it, nothing is really gonna happen. And it's here where I really start to address the issue of the emotions that come in, right? Like when you spend money, you could feel the guilt, you could feel the shame. And so here I really start to teach like once you're free and you could just disassociate the emotions to money, they're no longer controlled by your emotions. OK? And then you could just use your money as a tool, which is really all this. All right. Next up number four is flow. So that's mastering the money. Yeah, it is mastering the money and really mastering what makes you happy, what you really enjoy to do and starting to use the money for what makes you happy. So instead of being reactive with your money and just getting things as you need, it's really about being like, oh, I really enjoy buying this and being intentional with where you spend your money. But there's also fun and that's fun. Fun. I like that. You put that in there because it's realistic. We wanna have fun. Yeah, I this whole thing like wait till you retire and have fun with your money later on. Really? It's the fifth stage but I feel like it needs to be highlighted on all of them and exist in all of them, which is why like the guilt, free spending and enjoying your money and really, again, being intentional of finding like what things do you enjoy? Not keeping up with the Joneses, but like what brings you joy and then spending your money on that or also finding free ways right? To accept things like sunrises and flowers, everything isn't associated with money that needs to be happiness. I like that. That's right. There is free, fun out there all the time and be open to it. Thank you so much for all of that.